Me and this girl have become friends over the past semester. I am a med student, and she is pre med. So anyway, we’ve become friends. We get along really well. She thinks my friends are cool. We’ve spent time alone and open up to each other easily.
Lately I think we’ve been getting closer. Like she seems a little more playful. Maybe it’s just me. But anyway, I told her I had learned to cook, and she was excited. She said that I should demonstrate for her. One thing lead to another, and when break is over she is coming over and we are going to cook dinner for each other.
Here’s the thing. Neither of us have ever been in a relationship. We aren’t kids. Just both kinda shy and busy. I don’t think either of us is good at sending signals or reading them. I don’t even know if she really likes me.
I want this dinner to go well. So I chose a new recipe to make for her. I’ve asked the roommates to be out for the evening. I have something nice to wear. And I was planning on us watching a movie together, like before dessert or something.
Is there anything else I should or shouldn’t do? What can I do to find out if she is interested in me or not?
That sounds really cozy and prefect. I think you should make something fun, with a lot of spices and then a really messy dessert, so it will be cute when she has powder all over her face!
You shouldn’t act like it isn’t a date. Show your feelings subtly. Flirt with her, let her catch you looking at her in a ‘I think you’re beautiful way’ and try to flirt. Since you don’t have much experience, you might feel awkward. Just touch her, not super sexually, just lightly on the shoulder or push her hair out of her face. Make her feel wanted!
I don’t think there’s anything else you can add to the date, because since you aren’t together yet, you don’t want to do anything too extravagant.
You sound like a really great guy! This girl is lucky. =) And she obviously likes you if she’s coming over to your house alone.
I have noticed more and more over the years that a lot of people do not teach their children how to cook, clean, or even do laundry and I wish understand the reasoning behind this.
I would think that teaching your children these skills would be a valuable asset in their adult lives.
And I’m not just talking about new parents today, I know people who cannot do any of these things that are 18 years old and all the way up to 45 years old.
So when I do ask them "Why do you eat out everynight?, Why don’t you cook?, Why do you have to take your laundry to a cleaning service?", do you know what kind of responses I get?
"I don’t know how., No one ever showed me how to do it., We had somebody else do it for us."
What sense does this make?
And please, before I have to hear about the fact that I don’t have children, I grew up in a large family and being the oldest, I had to help raise and take care of my siblings. And all of us know how to do these basic things.
For those who asked what is my basis for this, here are a few examples.
Example 1: My mother has a neighbor who is 45 Years old and his mother comes over 6 days a week to do his laundry, buy groceries, cleans his house and takes out his garbage.
Example 2: My ex who is 25 years old never had to do anything in the house when he was growing up, so when we moved in together you could imagine what I came home to on after the 1st day.
Example 3: A 33 year old coworker of mine eats out every meal of the day, and doesn’t even know how to make a sandwich at home.
It seems that your examples could also be a cause of laziness and dependency, however, I know what you mean. My children (8 & 3) help me do the household chores. Yes, they are supervised when using solvents or machinery, but my 8 year old knows how to operate the washing machine, does the dusting (she loves to dust, go figure!), vacuums the house, mops the floor, washes windows, and cleans the bathroom counters all without complaining… because she understands that these things need doing, and that Mommy is not going to do it all by herself. Why should I? Her dad is also teaching her how to cook (I don’t like to cook, so that is my hubby’s job). The 3 year old feeds the dog, helps me unload the dishwasher, also loves to dust (it must be the neat duster we have), and picks up her toys every day. This is just how it is in our family, so they know no different. I want them to be able to be self-sufficient when they get older. I also want them to have respect for all the chores that must be done, and for the people that do them daily (like mom!) We have a chore choice chart at home, and the kids get to choose their own chores to do each week. It is a laminated sheet that we can write on with a dry erase pen, and each week, we start with a blank page. Each person can choose to do whatever chore they want, provided that they all get checked off during the week. My oldest likes this, and tries to get her favorite chores before anyone else does… which is great, since it makes her do it quickly and motivates her. My hubby’s best friend still lives at home (33), has mom do his laundry and basically take care of him. I don’t want my kids to be living at home when they are 45! : )
i know all children are different due to maturity, but what age did you allow your children to cook?
some where between 10 & 12
tall enough to see into a pot on the stove..
the oven she made cookies at 10
somewhere about 14 she did the turkey dinner for thanks giving with lots of Help from all of us..
I divorced when she was 17…
she is the light of my life she is 42..
thank you for the tear ..
The Easy Bake oven is the main one. You can buy all kinds of kitchen accessories such as pots and pans, dishes, cake mixes, cupboards, etc.
I have never really wanted to work, I would much prefer to be supported financially by my husband and have children. I recently said this in my Gender Studies class and I received a lot of glares. As a woman, I believe my role is to raise children, as well as cook for my husband and children and take care of the household…why can’t people accept this? And where will I find a man who desires me to do this as well?
If the stereotypical roles created by your grandparents and all the generations that preceded them had not been structured as they were, the freedom of choice you now enjoy would not have come about. The whining and mewling and puking that prevails today would easily have disappeared in their generations as the women who complained enough did. It is an irony that women of today demand equal rights with men, but when they get them, all they do is complain. This is true because you cannot strengthen the weak by weakening the strong. This is true for both sexes of all centuries and it is as true today as it was then. The strong will of both sexes prevails through the choices they make and through their willingness to see to it that their choices do shape the future their desires command. If you wish to be a stereotypical housewife of the ilk your grandparents were then, by all means, get up your gumption and go, gal. You can start by not listening to the exhortations of those of either sex that stand in your way. After all, most of the naysayers don’t pack the gear to rise to the level you aspire to that made this country great in the first place. Shoot ‘em down by setting an example they cannot, and will not, live up to. All talk and no do will always lead to only more failure. Don’t let your sun go down in a wash of words. Yours is a proven noble goal. Stick to it.